Thursday, July 10, 2008

10-commandments for working in an office

I know that I have been hitting the whole religious correlation thing pretty hard this week but wait..I think you can relate even if you do work!
1. If thou are an idiot and make stupid decisions, then thou shalt be mocked and ridiculed
2. If thou does not feel the need to speak with a co-worker thou has the ability to walk faster use an alternate path to a destination including stairs rather then an elevator in order to advert conversation
3. Unless totally unable, thou shalt use the stairs to travel 1 floor-up rather then hold-up the elevator for people who need to travel more then 2-floors
4. If thou pees on the seat thou shalt clean it up!
5. Thou shalt not bang on their keyboard when typing
6. If thou has a cold or needs to clear their throat GET A COUGH DROP rather then adding noise pollution throughout the office or meetings
7. If thou is sick, stay home. People like me who should reside in a "bubble" catch everything and WILL get sick
8. Lunch hours should be mandatory and not limited to 1-hour followed by 1/2-hour nap or gossip time
9. Inevitably if thou are an idiot and make stupid decisions thou shalt be moving up corporate ladder quicker then the worker bees
10. If thou breaks or the jams the community Paleozoic fax machine, printer, or copy machine, attempt to fix it or leave note BROKEN
Can you tell what sort of day I am having! I am hungry now, off to my mandated lunch!

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