There is NOTHING Cool about going to the BMV

Today I had the pleasure of getting my driver's license renewed. Like every other idiot in there I should have read the website for policies and procedures because I went there blind unsuspecting of such a long wait not knowing if I needed proof of insurance or simply my old card. I mean, I had my lipstick with me in attempt to take a some what decent mug shot, what more could you need? However, what the website can't prepare you for is the people who always tend to be at the BMV. Clearly some of the conversations I overheard while checking my myspace account (does NO CELL PHONES signs posted also include Internet usage??) was no only inappropriate, but would also make Jerry Springer guests seem like geniuses. For example, this rather LOUD character informing some innocent bystander her story about her son "beating some one's ass" for picking on some 12-year-old girl. Although it could be justified, the details were clearly too graphic for the bystander to take. I could tell by her eyes she was saying "save me" . I thought for a second about changing the conversation and found it more appealing to look at my hairdresser's photos from her wedding. The character on my other side looks like he hitched-up his horse outside and had the tightest wranglers I have ever seen in my life. He felt it necessary to moan the entire time about the 45 minute wait (maybe if he traded his horse in for a blackberry he too could be on myspace stalking his friends and acquaintances and not be so bored). I know most of the people there looked like some caught-red-handed criminals on To Catch a Predator, but were they thinking the same about me?
After you spend your hard-time in Carni-ville, you get this lovely piece of $24 plastic (mind you they don't take credit card-who doesn't take credit card??? McDonalds even takes credit card!!) with an absolutely horrible picture that I will dread showing anyone for the next 4-years. Pray my days of being carded are behind me! Maybe I will purposely lose it and go again through this torture after I get "glammed-up". Then again, who am I kidding, the one trait I got from my Dad was the ability to lose EVERYTHING, I guarantee I will be back in the nut house they call the BMV very soon not by choice!

Here is some vitamin "T" my love..have a nice day!

I had a pretty bad case of the flu this past weekend. After getting a rather late start to my slumber I was awaken by some terrible coughing coming from my bedroom (I tend to shift to the couch when my back bothers me). Oh no! I spread my germ love onward! My husband who never is sick caught this horrible virus that brought me to the brink of death. He finally shuffles out front for some ginger ale about 5:00 and asks me to take the boy to daycare. Let's see flu score: flu bug: 2
healthy immune system: 1

OH NO MY SON IS NEXT!!!

Today would have been the perfect day for monkey man (loving term for son) to be sick, I don't have a lot going on at work today and I could still make it to aerobics tonight. But karma never works like that for me. Tomorrow's are my absolute WORST day of the week (as far as being busy) and Thursdays aren't too far behind. So I wake him up this morning, feel his head..a little warm but not too bad. I give him a dose of vitamin "T" and send him on his merry way. I know what you are thinking, a good Mom would prevent the other kids from catching the virus at day care but he truly did not show any signs and chances are he will be home two days later in the week. Trust me, I have seen parents bring their kids in with spots on them watch them cough-up lungs we try not to do that to our day care. So, I know I am not up for parent of the day today, but can you prevent the inevitable? Besides, I have the cell phone next to me, waiting patiently and unwillingly for that call to come and get him.

Here is hoping all of you stay healthy in this warm weather!

Thou Shalt Not Use Tiffany's name in vain

As a Catholic, I feel I have the obligation to attend sanctuary and worship only one God.
As a shopper I completely follow the same beliefs. A few months back we were taking my son on a trip over to Easton to ride the trolley and play in the fountains. When we went over to watch the sailboats in another fountain and glimpsed across the pond to see the heavens unfold and the clouds part. Could it be? Am I reading the sign right? A Tiffany's in Columbus Ohio? I immediately looked at my husband who shook his head in disbelief. As he groaned at the site of the new complex I looked at him square in the eye and said "hey, at least you don't have to pay for a flight to Vegas, or pay shipping charges now".
What is it about that store that brings me to my knees and do unspeakable chores around the house? Is it the Elsa Pereti collection I so adore? Is it the signature collection or the clock collection? I truly think it has more to do with receiving that little blue box. Thinking about it brings a tear to my eye. Christmas came early my friends!!
The only reason I mention that is I have a birthday coming around the corner (unfortunately) and soon Christmas will be here and instead of that new camera we desperately need, my devotion to my "little blue box" will probably get the better judgement of me.
I will remind you as I do my husband, at least the collections I do like are the cheapest in the lot throughout the store, so I am not all bad... And remember, Thou shalt not use Tiffany's name in vain!

So finally here is a LIKE or rather a Love

I absolutely love watching my son play in the fountains at Easton! Is it wrong to mostly enjoy the part where the water shoots right in his face?

I want to be Carrie Bradshaw but I am more of Mary Poppins

I have two parts of my life. I have these glamours dreams and expensive tastes and the nanny life. Take some time to ask my husband why our bank account is non-existent and he will point you to a closet full of shoes or designer purses. I try to justify it with my full-time career, but now that I have a backyard that needs a swing set and my brilliant idea to have my husband slaving over a pond less waterfall in 90-degree heat, I need to give-up my champagne wishes and caviar dreams and accept the fact I am now Mary Poppins. We aren't talking the sweet Julie Andrews version but a definitely less sophisticated version. In order to get my son to clean after he makes a horendous mess (how is that possible in less then 1/2 hour) I need to sing this clean-up song he sings at daycare I do not know the words (nor care to learn). In additon to my nanny skills, I find myself singing Disney songs in the car and not realize they continue to play my ENTIRE trip to work. When I worked at the Disney store I could sing every song to the Lion King, now I must admit I can not only sing it, but recite all the words.
I have a few girlfriends (you know who you are..love ya, mean it) where I will cherish my time at childless dinners, or times by the pool reading gossip magazines, drinking far too much wine, or simply going for a pedicure. I still read-up on my celeb gossip, hot fashions, and home interior trends. But at the end of the day the Burberry purses US weekly subscription have to be substituted with dance lessons swing sets, and killing my husband off slowly with these projects to do in the 90-degree heat.
Next post will likely be a singles ad and I will be longing to be Samantha Jones instead!

I am out of the blogging closet!

I am out of my blogging closet and I am proud. Thank you all for the wonderful feedback and updates. I look forward to sharing some more stories with you soon! Your support and feedback really mean a lot. Leave all grammar and criticisms at the following address nosuchaddress.com.

This world is far too automated

This weekend the family packed-up the jeep for a long weekend in Gatlinburg Tenn . My mother-in-law had a national dance competiton and we were able to tag-along. I have notice my son is finding far too much enjoyment in visiting every restroom in every establishment. I fear his future list life dreams went from a bus driver to a toilet inspector. At first I thought he was into his hygene when he always wanted to wash his hands. Well as you proceed to take him into the restroom he runs back to the toilet and screams "oooh yucky" (we can blame this on day care, not sure where he got that from..but easier to pawn it off on them). Well that is usually followed by me screaming at him to keeps his hands off the germ toilet and out of the water in the bowl. Immediately I am grossed out and can barely look at my son let alone hold him to wash his hands. I dodged back between faucets in an attempt to find an automatic faucet that works. I required more then one squirt of the automatic soap dispenser and it refused my request. I had to jump over to the non-working sink dispenser and back over to the working automatic sink (all while juggling a squirming 2-year-old, diaper bag, and purse-How is that for America's Got Talent). After we were done I waved at the paper towel machine in an attempt to dry his hands that were lingering in the dirty sink (I give up germ boy!!). After searching for a working paper towel holder I couldn't find another one in site. I continued to wave "hello" to the machine until I realized a few minutes later that the machine wasn't automatic, I had to pull the lever. I was so disgusted with the situation I wiped our hands on my pants, and abruptly left. I did however use my shirt bottom to open the germ infested door handle and made my way back to restaurant seat and table that I am sure is both sanitized and serves food that passes all areas of inspection...